After you get married, you spend a lot of time thinking about your wedding, what went great, what went wrong. It’s inevitable! Your wedding day is supposed to be the best day of your life after the INSANE amount of planning that brides do leading up to it. You would think that everything is going to be PERFECT and there’s NO WAY anything could go wrong. Let’s laugh together now, hahaha! If you’ve been a bride, you know what I’m talking about, and if you’re a bride-to-be or still looking for that special someone, I hope this post helps you and is a realistic approach to wedding regrets. I have spent a lot of time over the past year analyzing every detail of our wedding, and I am sharing with you today regrets we have from our wedding day, as well as blessings that we are SO glad we did.
WEDDING DAY REGRETS
1. Searching for J. Lo, the wedding planner.
I’ll start off with our biggest wedding regret, which is that we did not hire a wedding planner. Let me be more specific. Our budget did not allow for a full-time wedding planner, but even if it did, I would not have hired one. I am a planner. That’s who I am, so I was completely comfortable and excited about taking charge and planning our entire wedding. I’m more talking about a day of coordinator or even a week of coordinator. Looking back now, I, and I’m sure my mom would agree, that we would have made sure to at least hire a day of coordinator. The morning of the wedding, my mom and sisters were rushing around setting up decorations at the reception, steaming my dress, and talking to our vendors. I felt awful about this because they didn’t fully get to relax and enjoy the day. If you take away one thing from this post, hire a day of coordinator!
2. No cell phone zone.
We all see those posts on Facebook pleading for people not to have their phones out at weddings taking pictures, SPECIFICALLY when the bride is walking down the aisle. The bride and groom spend A TON of money on the perfect photographer to get those money maker shots, and there’s you, leaning in the aisle to take a crappy photo on your phone, blocking the bride’s view of her groom. Don’t be that person! I had made so many mental notes to have an announcement read to our audience before the ceremony stating this. With having a million things going on in my brain leading up to the wedding I completely forgot. I remember walking into the church, looking up, and all I could see were phones. If you’re a bride-to-be, make sure to have an announcement read or put a message on your wedding programs. Again, don’t be that person! Okay, rant over.
3. As long as I got my suit and tie.
Ryan loved the guys’ tuxedos for the wedding, especially that they were from Perlis, one of his favorite clothing stores. But he sometimes thinks he could have chosen another option. Just like how the bridesmaids are spending all of this money on a bridesmaids dress, the boys are, too. But the girls get to keep their dress, whereas the boys are renting their tuxes. It could have been nice for the guys to be able to keep their tuxedos had we gone with another vendor.
4. Smile for the camera.
When working with your photographer, they will typically ask you for a shot list, a list of photos they must take. Normally, this is the list for before the ceremony, getting ready photos, photos of the bridal party, and family photos. We really do have a so many great photos, staged and candid! But I wish I would have made a more detailed shot list for during the reception to get more friend group photos and extended family photos with Ryan and I.
WEDDING DAY BLESSINGS
1. I’m ready to PAAARRTTYYY
Your wedding day flies by. You’ve heard it a million times, and you’ve probably said it a million times. I knew no amount of time would be enough to celebrate Ryan and I’s love, but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t do something about it to help. A typical wedding reception is three hours long. If you think about it, by the time you have the cocktail hour, eat, mingle with people, you probably get to dance and party for maybe an hour. Ryan and I are party people so that wasn’t going to suffice! We decided to add an extra hour to the reception to make it a four hour reception. This is by far the BEST thing we did for the wedding. You spend all of this money and time planning this day, then you blink and it’s over. By adding an extra hour, we were able to celebrate with all of our friends and family that much longer. And when are you going to have all of your favorite people together like that again? Savor it!
2. I see it. I like it. I want it. I got it.
I know bridesmaid dress shopping can get hectic with so many opinions and take a long time depending on the size of your group and how many dresses you want to try on. I decided to make this process easier. A week before our bridesmaid dress shopping appointment with all of the girls, me, my mom, and ONE of my bridesmaids went dress shopping. We tried on over ten dresses and narrowed it down to three that I loved! By doing this in advance I knew I was going to make the dress shopping experience with all of the bridesmaids shorter and less stressful. And I am so happy I did this! For our appointment at Bella Bridesmaids, the girls tried on the dresses, and I let them decide which one they wanted. At the end of the day, they are the ones who are buying these dresses and they have to wear them, not me. Letting them decide on the dress gave them control of the situation and made them feel valued and important. And since I loved the three dresses I narrowed it down to, I was completely fine with whatever decision they made.
3. Like mother, like daughter.
My mom and I have always had a special bond. My sister always says, “Katelyn’s the baby,” or “Katelyn’s my mom’s favorite.” Not true, Kristen! She loves us the same! 😉 But, I knew I wanted to do something special for my mom at the wedding. I planned a surprise mother-daughter dance following the father-daughter dance and mother-son dance during the reception. We danced to “True Colors,” which is a special song to us. And let me just say, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house! Now I’m not writing this to tell you to have a mother-daughter dance at your wedding, but if you want to, go for it! The moral of the story is that it’s your wedding day and you can do whatever you want! There are no rules.
4. Practice makes perfect.
Everyone is already a little on edge and nervous for the big day, so we decided to break the tension and have an alternative rehearsal dinner. We had a rehearsal party held at my aunt’s house in her beautiful garden, as opposed to a fancy dinner, and it was perfect! It was much more laid back and casual, and everyone had a blast. It was the most intimate and different rehearsal dinner that I had ever been to.
The bottom line is that no matter what happens or what you do at your wedding, it will be perfect to you because it will be YOUR day! Sometimes things go according to plan, and sometimes they don’t, which is kind of how marriage is. Sometimes you think back to how you could have handled something differently, and sometimes it plays out just how you wanted. It’s all about how you handle the situation. It’s important on your wedding day, and in life, to not sweat the small stuff and to enjoy the moment!